Why do we dwell on the past so much? Why do we create this time machine of memories to a time that usually haunts us? The memories of a happier state of being that you once achieved all gone but, stored in the very fibers of your mind that you not only wish you had again but, at the same time wished they were ripped out of your skull. So that no one may be able to re visit such places that cause you so much pain but at the same time bring a smile to your face. Am I to learn from these memories? Or do I resent them?
For now I don’t want to create anymore memories. I do not want to live in a romantic tragedy of a life. I rather my life be one of self fulfillment and accomplishment, rather a life that is paved with only broken hearts and resentment and pain. But isn’t that what life is? Or is it something that they tell us to make it easier. We have a choice to care or not care. A choice. We choose to care because we love not being alone and being loved for who we are. But before we can do any of that we must love ourselves. Accept our faults, and use our strengths and continue to make ourselves better. Not only until then can we truly love another person.
Do I love who I am? Yes and no. Do I try to be better? I am doing the best I can now. Have you changed since realizing this? Yes. Is it for you or for some one else? For myself.
Happiness. Happiness is something that can not be attained from someone other than yourself. You and only you can make you happy.
First step to reaching this is to stop lying to yourself and to the others around you. Look in the mirror and realize that what you are telling yourself to make you feel better is just an excuse that you made up so you can reach the bare minimum of life. The first step is the biggest and hardest one but it is worth it.
The second step is to know not think know what makes you happy not anyone else but yourself.
Third step know your goals not think eh maybe I want to do this but know in your heart what the hell kind of impact you want to make on this world.
The fourth step is doing. I would say this is also one of the hardest steps but it goes hand in hand with step one because with doing there is going to be excuses of why I can’t do it and those excuses are just lies you are telling yourself. Don’t make excuses just do!
I believe my heart is tired of loving.